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Saturday Night Live kicked off with Bowen Yang reprising his role as George Santos in what could be one of the last instances of the former congressman being the subject of such a high-profile lampoon given his expulsion from the House of Representatives Friday.
Santos’ removal — the sixth such expulsion in the chamber’s history — came amid his indictment for nearly two dozen crimes including identity theft and wire and credit card fraud. A damning House ethics report earlier this month also alleged, among many other misdeeds, spending of campaign funds for personal use, and concluded that he “sought to fraudulently exploit every aspect of his House candidacy for his own personal financial profit.”
Yang, draped in black like Santos was during his expulsion vote, opened his farewell press conference outside the Capitol by pleading for everyone to stop “assaulting” him.
“This entire country has beenbullying me just because I’m aproud, gay thief.What else is new?America hates to see a Latinaqueen winning,” he said. “Since the day I was elected,it’s been a witch hunt, but ifI’m guilty of anything, it’s forloving too much/fraud.”
Yang then called on a reporter (Ego Nwodim), asking for her “name and routing number.”
“You want me to say that I’mlost, that I’m humiliated?” he went on. “Fine, so I’m no longercongressman Santos.I’m regular old professor major general reverend astronaut Santos,protector of the realm, princessof Genovia.Now is being expelled and prosecutedfor 23 felonies a setback?Sure.But I promised myself I wouldn’tlet it ruin my Kwanzaa.OK.Next question.You, give me your mother’smaiden name and childhood pet.”
As for how he’ll be remembered, Yang replied: “As amartyr, as a champion of thepeople.They’ll think of me as themodern Princess Diana and themodern Marilyn Monroe, which iswhy I think I would like to singa tribute to myself.”
Yang then hopped on the piano and recounted his lowest moments from his brief tenure in office, singing to the tune of Elton John‘s “Candle in the Wind”:
“And it seems to me I’ve lived my life like a scandal in the wind /
Never knowing who to cling to when the law closed in.”
…
“And it seems to me I’ve lived my life like an evil Forrest Gump /
I’m the guy who lied even too much for Donald Trump.”
