Trump Is Desperately Trying to Bomb and Shitpost His Way to Peace

As he embarked on his attacks on Iran, President Donald Trump was clear that his initial bombing run would be followed by unbelievable destruction, if the government in Tehran angered him too much. But then after giving war a chance, he was clear that he wanted “peace” for all nations involved. Then, he toyed with the idea of a “regime change” war. And then he announced a supposed ceasefire. But then he got very mad on the internet that nobody was following his huffy ceasefire demands. Then, he got really mad online, again. And then… who the hell knows? Even senior members of his own administration sometimes don’t seem to know what to make of this Trumpian blitz of war and supposed peace.

One thing is for sure: Trump wants you to believe that he can shitpost, bully, and even bomb his way to lasting, durable peace.

For years, Trump has wanted to win a Nobel Peace Prize, and both in and out of office, he has routinely brought up the topic of this elusive honor, people close to him say. However, you do not need to take their word for it, largely because the president often complains in public and on the internet about not getting a Nobel Peace Prize that he can mount in his office.

One reason for that is, despite his anti-neocon rhetoric, Trump has developed a markedly pro-war track record during both of his administrations, and the body count to go with it. His warfare against Iran is just the latest exhibit in that long record.

To this day, Trump still gets visibly upset when the issue is brought up in private conversations, according to a source who’s discussed it with him recently in this presidency, and he will lament that he might have to “save the whole world” in order to win the prize this term — but even doing that, he believes, might not be enough to win over the Norwegian committee due to perceived anti-Trump bias.

But even within Trump’s second administration — which he packed full of yes-men, yes-women, and venal MAGAheads — there is some degree of hurt feelings over Trump’s attacks on Iran’s nuclear sites over the weekend, even if no one expects this disappointment to lead to resignations or anything useful, rather than anonymous venting to reporters.

Vice President J.D. Vance, a former Trump critic, has said repeatedly that one of the things that drew him to his new boss was Trump’s professed commitment to “ending endless wars,” and bucking the GOP’s old guard on militarism overseas. Trump’s big talk on being the “candidate of peace” was, of course, always a gigantic fraud, and Vance is still assuming the role of committed Trump uber-loyalist, backing Trump’s war to the hilt.

One quietly frustrated Trump appointee told Rolling Stone that the president’s haphazard Iran bombing policy reflects the kind of “warmonger shit that we’re supposed to be against.” But as this week progressed, this source said that “at least he’s a lazy warmonger.”

Trump had the military drop bunker-buster bombs on Iran’s nuclear sites on Saturday evening and was openly floating the notion of “regime change” in Tehran on Sunday. By Monday night, the president announced a ceasefire between Israel and Iran, and began once again demanding peace in the region. As Iran and Israel continued to exchange attacks Tuesday morning, Trump complained to reporters that the countries “don’t know what the fuck they’re doing.”

In the days prior to Trump’s order to strike Iran, another Trump administration official with knowledge of the military planning had described the president’s current Iran policy as Trump making “it up as he goes along,” largely depending on his mood — or even on what’s on his favorite TV channel. By Tuesday, as Trump was angrily demanding peace between Israel and Iran, this same official noted that “the president is now posting through it.”

This month, the Trump administration has been effectively speed-running their own MAGAfied version of the George W. Bush administration’s year-long build-up to the Iraq invasion, which was also defined by lies, aggressive propaganda, and manipulation of the intelligence community’s findings.

Over the weekend, Rolling Stone reported that no matter what the president and his team have said, Trump’s decision to bomb Iran had nothing to do with new U.S. intel on the Islamic Republic’s nuclear program. “There is no intel,” said one of the administration officials, who were granted anonymity to discuss sensitive matters. “Nothing new, that I’m aware of…[and] the intelligence assessments have not really changed from what they were before.”

White House spokesperson Anna Kelly claimed on Sunday, “This is false and lazy ‘reporting’ designed to undermine President Trump’s highly successful operation to dismantle Iran’s nuclear capabilities.” Trump, too, has claimed that “Iran’s key nuclear enrichment facilities have been completely and totally obliterated.”

At a bare minimum, it’s an entirely open question whether Trump’s bombings were as successful as the administration is claiming. According to CNN, an early U.S intelligence assessment indicates that Trump’s military strikes did not fundamentally destroy Iran’s nuclear program and likely only set it back by a few months.

White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt angrily posted on X, “This alleged ‘assessment’ is flat-out wrong and was classified as ‘top secret’ but was still leaked to CNN by an anonymous, low-level loser in the intelligence community.”

A source familiar with the matter tells Rolling Stone that the president has been “vocally” unhappy about the disclosure, and an aggressive leak investigation has already been ordered.

Asked what the past several days have meant for any potential Trump Doctrine, another Trump adviser says: “President Trump can fucking bomb you whenever he wants. If anybody thought he was screwing around before, I hope they got some clarity.”

For both the doves and the hawks in the U.S. government, there is no clarity on what Trump’s foreign policy is meant to look like. For the moment — with all of these officials knowing that Trump’s views can change from minute to minute — some are breathing a sigh of relief that literal World War III hasn’t broken out just yet.

Some Democrats are, too.

“The anti-war advocacy of the left and right broke through,” says Rep. Ro Khanna (D-Calif.). “I am glad cooler heads prevailed and Trump seems committed to stopping this war.

Last week, prior to the U.S. attacks on Iranian nuclear sites, Khanna offered a War Powers Resolution with Rep. Thomas Massie (R-Ky.) seeking to block Trump from unilaterally committing an act of war on Iran — which he then did.

“I spoke with Rep. Massie [Monday] evening and we are taking a wait and see approach about whether a vote will be needed now on our War Powers Resolution,” says Khanna. “Iran still has nuclear fuel to build bombs, according to Vance, and now they will get out of the [nuclear non-proliferation treaty] and also kick out inspectors. We need diplomacy unless America plans to bomb Iran every couple years, which would be a horrible outcome.”

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